Judgmental Coward
by MaximumAlchemist
Summary: "It all depends on how you see it. Is the glass half empty or is it half full?"


I have a lot I want to talk about. But I suppose that it wouldn't be any use to pour it all out at once. It would tire both you and me. I think it's best if you don't even bother to listen. Like everybody else.

Well, maybe not _everybody_.

I mean, there's him.

And _him_.

And myself, of course. I may not be your ideal person for optimism, but I'm _somebody._

Not "_nobody"._

But they just don't understand, do they?

Oh, wait, there's those two. But they're not one of _them. _

They're my _friends. _

It looks like you don't understand where we're going with this. I may have picked the wrong place to start. Then again, I may have not.

It just depends on how you look at it.

Because I'm just not good enough to deal with _them._

Humans.

* * *

Scientific name, "Homo sapiens". Consider themselves to be the "ultimate evolution", capable to understand speech and complex structures. Brain capacity: approximately two point five petabytes, or, to simplify that, one million gigabytes. Can express emotions clearly.

Imaginative.

That's the first word that comes to my mind when I think of humans. They like to imagine things. But they can be terribly limited. Yes, that too, is true. But some have intelligence far above others, so much that one might consider them as something called a "genius".

And some have so low brainpower that they are classified as "mentally retarded".

I find it funny that humans can be classified by their intelligence. And who created this classification system? Some human.

Isn't it weird—and rude—how we can judge people so quickly? Looks aren't everything, yes, but why do we tend it ignore that rule?

The truth is that I fear humans. Not anthropophobia. I'm not socially awkward like one might put. I don't even think there's a term for fearing humans _itself, _so I'll just make one up: Humanisphobia.

I like to wear a mask. Not a literal mask, but one to deceive others. Cruel, isn't it? But I must.

I can't help it.

They're _everywhere. _If I were put a blindfold over my eyes, I wouldn't be able to see them. But I'd hear them. I'd plug my ears; I'd muffle their voices.

But then I might run into one.

So that's no use.

I'm a coward.

Until I met those two.

* * *

I'm Ritsuka Omasuki.

But please call me Rin. Rin-chan is fine, too.

Don't ask me why. I'll never be able to give you a satisfactory answer. Just one that I'm comfortable with. We can't have that now, can we?

I'm thirteen. I solo my life. But I've started accepting parties ever since I moved to the hectic city of Ikebukuro. Mostly with a crazy man that I view as a "big brother". He loves humans. But not in a way you'd expect. He loves their pain, their sufferings, and enjoys seeing them in agony. I really didn't know what to think of him, considering my hatred contradicts to his love.

Of course, Izaya Orihara is a psychopath, but I'm fine with that. His psychotic ways captured my interest. Not many people think this way.

And the other, a wild, vending machine-throwing beast. Also known as the Fortissimo of Ikebukuro. Claims he "hates violence", and has a very short temper. Light it up and he explodes. But it's _hilarious! _Almost comical. I can understand why Izaya loves to provoke him.

This is no other man but Shizuo Heiwajima.

* * *

I stepped off the train platform and was immediately jostled by the crowd of people.

They were flooding the subway system, both hurriedly and lackadaisically going back and forth. They moved in an undefined pattern, slowing down, speeding up, thinning and gathering at random paces.

It scared me.

I tried to blend in with the crowd, let them take me within the current. That's why I came to Ikebukuro. To become one of them.

I soon learned that I was wrong.

"Excuse me—pardon me, sorry," I mumbled as I pushed my way past mobs of people, trying to keep my eyes on the signs and the past mobs of people, trying to keep my eyes on the directory signs and the You-are-Here boards.

I cranked up the music beating in my ears a bit more. It was like a drug to me, the music. The beats. The rhythm. The voice, the instruments.

I edged my way out of the crowded gates and make my way blindly into the glaring sunlight beaming down on the city I would call home.

The first thing I noticed was: the size.

It wasn't sprawling or humongous, but it was big enough for me. Then again, I was raised in a tiny village on the outskirts of Kyoto.

"Wow…" I breathed out. The skyscrapers and office buildings towered over my head, the light reflecting off of their shiny, gleaming glass windows.

I've never felt smaller in my life.

I took of my headphones, letting the sounds of the city flood my ears. I smiled. It was different.

The honking of the traffic and incessant chatter of humans met my ears. Laughter and incoherent speech.

I covered my ears with the headphones again, the music resuming once again. It was a different song this time. "Unhappy Refrain – Rin and Len Kagamine", my iPod read. I must've forgotten to pause when I took it off. Oh well, no matter. I liked all the songs downloaded into it. They comforted me.

First things first. I needed to find a place to stay. Hotels won't cut it—they were too expensive. I needed to find an apartment that I could afford.

I aimlessly wandered about for a while, until I spotted a café with free Wi-Fi. I chose a sunny seat on a bench near it and unslung my messenger bag and opened my laptop. I connected and began to surf the Net.

I needed to find somewhere safe to stay before sundown. I remembered some of my old classmates talking about the gangs in the big cities and how territorial they were. They would have gang wars and wreak havoc. It would really bad if I were to be caught up in their conflicts.

I naturally assumed that gangs were mostly active at night, but I could see that they prowled the streets in broad daylight. I started to notice that many people wore the same color—some had yellow scarves and yellow headbands as such, some displayed the color blue with garments in the cool hue.

They were branded with colors. And they showed them off shamelessly.

So as I browsed through the list of cheap apartments, I thought about the dangers and woes of a city newbie. There would be the mobs, of course. And humans. You could never get too close to one, I learned. Getting lost would be a problem as well, but I already picked up a map on the train. I would set out tomorrow to scout the city and make myself a mental map of the city's layout. Who knows, I might even find a job.

I skimmed through one of the apartment's description briefly. _Happy Sunshine Apartments, _the name was. It sounded _way _too happy.

But I glanced at its price. Not bad. Forty-nine thousand yen a month, it was pricey, but I could negotiate with the landlord to lower the price a bit. After all, bribing was one of my specialties, along with blackmail and getting information. Not only was the Internet a handy source, I had a wide range of vocabulary. Eloquent speech is a very vital persuasion tool.

I closed the lid of my laptop and packed it and set off for Happy Sunshine Apartments, hoping that the landlord was generous enough to knock off a couple thousand yen.

* * *

"Eh…well…you ask for a lot, young lady."

The landlord scratched his chin slowly. "How old are you?" he asked.

I straightened. "I'm thirteen, kind sir. I recently moved to Ikebukuro due to my fascination with the spectacular architecture the modern age has to offer. And it's absolutely splendid, as far as I can see!" I said, the lies sliding off my tongue as water would run off a tilted surface.

"You like architecture?" the landlord asked. "That's a…an interesting hobby for a person at your age."

"Why, thank you! I believe everyone should have different interests and passions. It's what makes each and every individual unique."

"Yes, it is. I can see that you have a good point there," he agreed. His ran his fingers through his auburn hair, green eyes mildly surprised and interested. "What school did you go to?"

"Oh," I said. "I didn't go to any school in particular. I was homeschooled."

"Ah, I see. And your name…what was it again?"

"I am Ritsuka Omasuki," I said. _He sure has a short memory, _I thought_. _"But please call me Rin. Honorifics are discretionary."

"Oh, okay. Sorry," he said sheepishly. "I'm Tsunayoshi Kyoko. You can call me Tsuna."

"It's an honor, Tsuna-kun," I said formally, offering him a hand. He took it and we shook. "Now, as I mentioned before, I want to rent a room here, but the price is a bit too high for me. I am requesting a lower in the bill."

"Well, that's…it depends. How much do you want off?" he asked, sighing.

_Sighing means he's agitated. I should be careful with my words at this point on if I want a deal, _I warned myself. "I would like a minimum of two thousand yen off," I said. I smiled a little to add effect. "But I want to put a maximum bar on ten thousand yen."

"Two thousand to ten thousand, eh? You have a high bargain," he mused, chuckling.

"Would you like me to raise the maximum bar a bit higher?" I asked sweetly.

"Oh, no, it's fine there! But could notch down the minimum?"

I shook my head. "Ah, but we can't have that! The base is set, we can't move it anymore! It's like a skyscraper—you've set the foundation and built a towering masterpiece on it. You're not satisfied with its location, so you try to lower the foundation a bit more. This will cause the building to become unstable and collapse! Same goes with money—you set the minimum. Lower it anymore, the deal will be broken. But, if you want to max it, you can always add another floor! The weights placed on either side of the building are like the stress on a person's shoulders, but no matter! It works out all the same in the end."

Tsuna bit his lip. "I guess you put it like that. It makes sense…sort of."

I laughed lightly. "It all depends on how you look at it."

He waved his hands. "Oh, no I'm not saying that you're wrong—"

I held up my hands to stop him. "And I'm not saying that it _has _to make sense. You may look at it a different way than me. It's all up to your imagination."

"My…imagination…?" he asked curiously. He shook his head. "I've given up trying to think up stuff a long time ago. It's no use to indulge yourself in imaginary fantasies. They'll just put you down. They'll never be granted."

I was appalled. "But that only limits you in life! What good is there to hide yourself from imagination? It'll only find you again."

He sighed again. "You are one hell of a philosopher, Rin-chan. Fine. For your intelligence and way of thinking, I'll knock off six thousand yen. How does that sound?"

I wanted him to raise the discount a bit more, but I chided myself to think that way. I would sound way too greedy. I wasn't that kind of person. No. I was Rin. Ritsuka Omasuki. The human that was afraid of humans.

"I accept," I said, finalizing it. "Do I pay now or at the end of this month?"

"You can pay it now."

"I'll do," I said, fishing out my money pouch. "Forty-three thousand yen. No need to check it, I'm not that low."

"Alright, I trust you," he said, laughing. "You can have room 114. Up the stairs, down the hallway, sixth door on your left. There's a map if you need it."

I thanked him and climbed up the stairs, taking two at a time. I followed his directions and reached room 114.

Inserting the key into the hole, I opened the door and took a good look around. It was musty, kind of small, but comfortable.

I pressed the light switch and they flickered to life.

I had to dust the place off. The electricity would cost me, so I turned off the lights and threw open the curtains. The drapes smelled of the sun.

I needed some cleaning supplies, so I grabbed my iPod and covered my ears with the headphones. Turning it on, I turned on the volume a bit more and exited the room, locking it. I headed downstairs and out the door, back into the afternoon light.

I realized I could just make my mental map right now instead of waiting until tomorrow. I only had half a day, but I could just do a quick scan and _then _make it fully detailed tomorrow.

I started at the main street. There were four streets, all meeting at an intersection, forming a cross.

The crossing light turned green and I crossed. The song playing in my ears ended and transitioned onto the next one, a three second silence in between. "The Lost One's Weeping – Rin Kagamine" was displayed on the screen.

I enjoyed a lot of Neru's works because he understood human emotion very well. The lyrics and songs he writes—I can relate to. I love the way he programs the VOCALOIDs. I love his songs.

Of course, I listen to others, like Wowaka, Hachi, and Kemu, but their songs haven't really captured me as much as Neru's. There's just something else…

I was lost in my thoughts and didn't wasn't paying attention to where I was going until I ran into someone.

"Oh, sorry, excuse me," I mumbled, not looking up. I ran into a human, but there was no need to look at them. Just apologize, and that ends it.

I kept walking, past a tall man who was happily handing out flyers, saying things in short, simple sentences. "Sushi is good! Russia sushi! Come try some! It's good!"

I didn't pay him, or anyone in particular, any attention, until a rough hand grabbed my collar.

"Hey, you ran into me."

I turned my head and saw two eyes behind blue shades glaring down at me. I attributed his messy blond hair as, not his natural hair color, as it was uncommon in Japan. Unless he was from another country? Or his parents were foreign and he was born here?

His breath reeked of cigarettes and his grip was unnaturally strong. He lifted me at least a foot off the ground so I could look at him directly in the eyes.

"Or so I noticed," I said dryly, rolling my eyes. "I apologized, and I will again. I'm terribly sorry for running into you, I beg for your forgiveness. Please have mercy on this poor, poor child. May the heavens bless you with eternal health and fortune. Now put me down."

"Hah?"

A dreadlocked man approached him. "Shizuo. Put her down. We've got business to attend to," he said tiredly, pushing his glasses back into place on his nose.

'Shizuo' studied me for a bit, his eyes narrowed and sharp. His grip never loosened. The way he looked at me sent shivers up my spine. It was unnerving—like a bear watching its prey's every move. I dared not to move a muscle. After all, I somehow knew that if I tried to wriggle free, he would snap my neck.

"_Shizuo."_

"Yeah, yeah, I know," Shizuo replied. "Sorry, Tom-san." He dropped me, none too ruthlessly, and I landed on the hard pavement.

"Could you be _a little _gentler?" I asked, wincing as I stood. Dusting myself off, I glared up at him.

He ignored me. "Who's late on their debt this time?"

Tom-san checked his watch. "Some guy who borrowed two thousand dollars. His reason is unknown. Late by two weeks, we can't afford to wait anymore. I want you to stay outside while I go in to deal with him. Don't want you to interfere—things might get uglier if you're involved."

"Tch. Whatever."

Shizuo raised his head and grimaced. "It stinks," he said simply.

"Doesn't it always?" I asked. "Pollution, overpopulation—"

"No," he interrupted. "It stinks."

"Doesn't really clear it up," I grumbled.

"We have to go," Tom-san said again. "Nice talking to you, kid—"

"The 'kid's' name is _Rin Omasuki,_" I said irritably.

"Okay, _Rin Omasuki, _it was nice talking to you. Now let's go, Shizuo."

Shizuo lit a cigarette and took a long drag from it. "Coming," he said.

He gave me one last skeptical glare and followed Tom obediently.

The two disappeared down the streets of Ikebukuro, leaving me standing there, wondering what the heck just happened.

It wasn't long before I heard a war-like cry and a loud crash.

"IIIZAAAAAAAAYAAAAAAAAA!"

* * *

**So there you go. My first DRRR! fanfic and I must admit, I had some pretty negative thoughts when I first thought of this. I thought it was overrated—with the girl protagonist and Shizu-chan and Izaya. It felt like a Mary Sue to me when I wrote this, and I didn't like the idea much. I don't like the idea of them both "falling in love" with an OC, so romance isn't one of the genres, but I guess it's sort of like a 'friendly' romance. **

**Since I felt like it was a Mary Sue, I decided to make her less Sue-y. I thought that she and Izaya would get along pretty well, along with a few bumps here and there, and I created some flaws. A) She's a master liar, B) she can influence someone with words (like Izaya), and C) she has 'Humanisphobia'.**

**I'm not sure **_**if **_**there's actually a phobia for fearing humans directly. Rin-chan here isn't really awkward around people, as she can speak fluently and persuasively while sounding logical at the same time. But she's scared about the **_**species, **_**and how they evolved, how they think and act. I guess you could say that she hates them and is extremely worried that her 'weakness' might slip out on accident. **

**Yes, she listens to VOCALOID a lot. I guess I decided to add a bit of 'me' into her, as I LOVE Neru's work. I made Rin-chan here *pats her head*, a melancholy sort of person. As you've read so far, she listens to songs like "Unhappy Refrain" and "The Lost One's Weeping". And one more thing that I wanted to add, the reason why I capitalize VOCALOID is because "Vocaloid" looks too…weak, I guess. Maybe it's just me. **

**I don't know if I'll continue this or not, I wrote it out because there was this annoying plot bunny that demanded for attention. I'll leave the rest to you guys: tell me if you want this fanfic to be continued or not. **

**Thanks for reading! **(^-^*)**  
**


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